Part 56: Getting Hitched

Getting Hitched

Music: Festival


I guess I should deal with this pesky festival before popping the question.


And crops. I'm close to the point where I really don't have to care about crops anymore, but I figure I should put a token effort into winning the final crop festival.



I took some turnips from Link's farm without--
W-what did you do?!

No, seriously, what DID you do? It's impossible to have full grown turnips on the farm at this point, what with it being the first day of the season and all.

Which also makes me wonder why the Turnip Fight is today, but details.



Oh, I completely forgot. But I'm gonna throw it at you as hard as I can. Ha ha ha!
Oh, thanks. Heh heh.

Spoilers: This update will be cut short when Link dies an gory death to turnips.



I just can't help it...
Gaius?!


That's...a really good question. Are turnips just more of a Thing in Japan?



But mayonnaise is okay, don't you think?
Wait a second.


I'm glad the game is giving appropriate screen time to the Great Turnip Ketchup Disaster of '06.

And, you'd make more money with the bathhouse.
Sakuya...
I couldn't help myself.


The great tragedy of Marian is that if she can do shit like this, she could do actual super-useful things. Except that would require her to be not terrible.


It's true. The real reason I don't show off much of the actual farming is because it involves dark rituals where you throw turnips at unsuspecting passerby.


Let's get this show on the road.



It follows the standard festival progression of 'get a few things to throw->get a lot of things to throw->get some higher-point things to throw". How many variations of this have we done by now?


Fun fact: Blonde hair gives you better turnip-throwing powers.



Huh...?



How do they get tired?

...why is Sakuya carrying around an ice sculpture of an elephant trunk?


With that out of the way, it's time to propose!


And chase Pia around for a few minutes because Sakuya kept being too close, and I didn't want to accidentally propose to her. The town square is more scenic or something, anyway.


I...um...

Huh. Well Pia's affection is at 10, so that's not the problem. And I have the double bed. And every site says these same marriage requirements, so it's not like the wiki's wrong.

The problem is actually much dumber than that. And I solve it completely by accident.


We've finished all her quests, so that's not the problem either. But maybe we have to do some of her family's quests?



Yes. I'd be happy to help.
Thanks. We're a small inn, so we can't hire our own cook. So I'll need to be able to step up when I need to...
Hmmm, well, how about we start with trying to make Boiled Egg.
Boiled Egg? That might be setting the bar too high.
Umm....Well, yeah, it might be...
Well, do you mind waiting? I'll go get you the ingredients.

Fun fact: You specifically have to give her a large egg for this. She'll brush you off if you try to give her a small or medium one. This also means I have to wait until tomorrow to finish this, since I've used up my Cluckadoodles' eggs already.

And yes, this IS the "haha, a girl can't cook, this is inherently hilarious" trope anyone who's consumed enough Japanese media knows and hates. How did you guess?


First batch of turnips are in.


And that means I can make pickle mix. But not turnip heaven, because that'd need gold turnips. What is with all the turnips in this game??


It's an egg, Sakuya.

...
Anyway, it looks like we're all ready.
Yes. But we'll need a stove to cook on.
We can do it in my mom's room.


This seems like a terrible idea on several levels.

First, put some water in the pot.
Okay.
Next, add a little salt to the water. Then wait.until it boils, then add the egg in the pot.
There we go. The pot might be a little small.
Yeah...Wait, why are you putting it in?! The water hasn't boiled at all!
Oh...Okay, my first mistake, I guess. Anyway, what's next?
Well, I guess not everyone agrees when to put the egg in, but...
All you have to do is put it on medium heat and wait about 10 minutes.
For 10 whole minutes?! How am I supposed to wait that long?
I got it! How about we just turn the heat up?
Wait, if you raise the temperature suddenly!!






It exploded...
Yes.
I wonder why?
Well, if you can't even think of why, I think that's your problem.
That's why I hate eggs.


Aaaand we're doomed.

Oh, Shino...
Well, I thought I'd make a Boiled Egg, but the egg exploded.
Oh...
Well, why don't you take a bath? I'll clean this up.
I'm sorry...

Fade out, fade in.

But Sakuya, why did you suddenly want to cook? You said an innkeeper doesn't have to be able to cook.
Th-That was a long time ago.
Are you giving up on your dreams of being an innkeeper?
No. Actually, I thought I should be able to cook to become one. Because my dream is to be able to run an inn that monsters can stay in.



What?! What are you talking about?! I won't let you do that!
What?!
Why not?! There are some good monsters out there!
And how are you going to convince all of your customers of that?!
W-Well...
(Is Sakuya doing this for me...?)
If you insist, go do it somewhere else. I won't be a part of it.

Holy shit Shino. I know and all, but that's ice fucking cold.

What?!
Please wait! Shino, please trust Sakuya.
I don't care what you say, I won't be letting any monster stay in my inn.
Is that...?


Come on Shino, we did the Unity Festival and everything. Racism is Officially Over Forever.

...



Mom, you really hated monsters that much?!

Music: Sadness

Link, could you please turn back to a human? If you don't, then you can leave.
Mom!
(She didn't seem to mind during the Unity Festival, so why...?)
Link. Please.
Okay...


It might surprise you to learn that Link actually does have a backbone. It just takes a hell of a lot for him to access it.

Link!



Mom, this doesn't make sense! You never said anything before!


What the fuck, Shino. I thought you were cool.




We might not actually see the payoff for this, but yeah, sure, let's trust her.

Yeah! Leave it to me!
Oh, that's right. Here, this is for everything today. I'm really sorry, Link.
So, you just wait. I'm going to convince Mom one way or another!


It's been too long since my first playthrough to remember how this plot ends up, but considering that Shino a)is generally cool, and b)is shown as loving cute monsters, I suspect I know how this is going to go anyway.


But do you love Link enough to marry him??


Yeah, so there's an additional condition to getting married. The game actually mentions it back when you get the engagement ring recipe, but none of the Rune Factory sites specifically mention it. So if you forgot a single line in a conversation several weeks ago, tough shit.



I'd forgotten that(what with it being from an update two months ago and all), but I accidentally did it anyway. I figured I'd take Pia on a date while I tried figuring out what I was doing wrong.


On the way, I found out that my Emery Flower finally grew.

Incidentally, for anyone playing themselves, make sure you finish all your daily chores before going to propose. The game automatically advances to the next day afterwards!

Music: Date



What?! Is this your first time, Pia?
No, I come here a lot!
I-I see...It seemed like your first.
Really? I think you're tired. You should take a bath!
What?! Um...Uh...W-Well, Let's rest for a bit.
OK then!
It's so pretty.
Okay! Smells good too! I'll take some to put in a bath!


If only we could all be as easily pleased as Pia.

But I have lots of things that are special to me now.
Oh, really? Like what?
Heh heh. It's a secret!
Great! This will be perfect for my bath tonight.



Well then, I'll bring squid next time!
I'll pass.
Oh, then, if I prepare a bath that you really like...



I'll come visit. Just to see you.
Oh, OK then...
It's kinda weird, but I'm pretty happy, heh heh...
Hee-hee...Let's go then! To the baths!


Finally.


Link, could you at least TRY to look happy about proposing?

Here?! Now?! With you?!
Of course, silly!


I love you, Pia!
Me too!



And the game directly proceeds to...the second opening! I strongly encourage watching it becauce a)I appended the voice-acted proposal event to the start of it, and b)...well, you'll see.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ppVx1BMSsU